polygamy

By Christine Chacha

It started with Jacob Zuma's wife now it is king Mswatis wife, it seems like cheating is becoming the trend among the First ladies. While the world calls 20 year old Queen Nonthando Dube a whore for cheating on King Mswati with his friend, I think there is more than meets the eye on the issue. There are so many ironies that manifest themselves in the whole saga that we can not ignore.

First this is not the first queen to disgrace the royal family amidst infidelity rumors. In 2004 two other queens fled the palace and have all confessed to cheating due to getting sexually starved for over six months. Is this fair to the women?. Now this time his close pal and even a minister in his cabinet, Justice minister Ndumiso Mamba was caught pants down in a luxurious hotel owned by King Mswati doing the King's wife....-did i mention is not the first time the King is facing the same beef? What are these women saying? Perhaps tha these men aren’t the tigers in bed or are they yearning for more quality time or what?  While the normal man can not handle or deal with one women can you imagine how king Mswati deals with his 14 wives (and counting!) and , not forgetting the concubine.

Somehow I do not blame them, how do you keep young women who are known to be hot blooded sexually starved for up to 6 months without getting any? In a interview with the BBC King Mswati had revealed that he rarely has time for his family because he is overworked till 11pm. Besides what are the queens supposed to do while he spends months in other women bed? In this setting cheating is inevitable; I bet there are other queens who have been unfaithful, Nonthando’s only crime is getting caught .
Adultery is wrong but I think she should just be forgiven after all she was a 16 year old coerced into a marriage.By then all she saw was the palace, the good life and royal title now she is all grown up realizing there is more to life than that. Now sexually active, tired of waiting on a man who sleeps around ; She is just a woman making it even.

At the moment the queen is under house arrest in her mother-in-law’s home; her punishment is eventual banishment from the kingdom. Mamba is snaking no doubt (all puns intended) and the queen’s behavior is inexcusable, but the rebellion in the king’s harem may be a call for a reality check. This proves beyond reasonable doubt that Africa should ditch polygamy once and for all its clear that it doesn’t seem to work. “It’s a license to infidelity”, despite having many wives, the men still want more or like Zuma still cheat while their women for lack of attention and unsatisfied needs end up cheating.  Dont you think, the only way polygamy can work is when both parties have equal privileges?

Someone raised a very interesting argument that made me see the whole thing in new light. “Backstabbing and betrayal aside, what is so wrong with borrowing a friends car if he has too many?” he asked. According to him wives are like property to king Mswati, there is a whole nation to pick from. It is not like king Mswati loves his wives anyway; picking a wife is a duty to him. He does it like he would a car in a showroom or a pair of shoes in a shop and he will get a new one as long as he lives.
He does not understand is why they had to throw the poor man in prison. If convicted of the rather odd-sounding charge of ‘trespassing into another man’s home’, married Mamba, who was once a close friend of the king, could be executed. He has a point there because for years men have shared their women without a problem. Men in a quorum will spot a woman and lay a wager about who will score her first .Once one of them scores, he gives the rest thumbs up and they all have a share. There is no jealousy at that point because there is no love involved so why should Mswati be greedy and angry?  Think about it !!

chaxtine@yahoo.com